It is much easier to stick with what we know than to chart a new course and change dysfunctional behaviors. When you’re used to getting a response by acting a certain way, the tendency is to continue to act that way because you get results.
If you’re in a married relationship, I expect that you’ve detected patterns in how you disagree, where you compromise (where you won’t), as well as how you navigate change.
In life, there’s no finish line.
But so often, people rush about as though they’re going to get ahead. What works for me and how I handle problems will be different from you.
One pattern that I’ve noticed in life is the tendency for people to falter and give up right before they’re going to achieve their goal. Why?
Fear.
Maybe they’re afraid that people won’t love them if they change or they’re worried about what might come next. I know that I’ve stayed in place at jobs and in relationships because of fear.
I worried that I wouldn’t be able to get by if my life changed.
When I look back, I often laugh at how wrong I was.
We are always changing. Each and every day we’re dealing with subtle changes in who we are. Sometimes the changes take years, while at other times the change comes on quickly and with great force.
When we’re forced to change, our survival instincts kick in, but deciding to accept change freely is much more complicated.
As you go about your day, think about where you are on your journey. Are you just beginning? Are you about to overcome a great challenge?
Or is it easier to not make a decision?
Holding still, trying to ward off the change by being indecisive is a decision of itself.
Beware of wanting to hold back because of fear.
To grow and be healthy takes work and time.
That’s not popular to say that, but it’s true.