What if you loved someone and believed you were meant to be with that person, but they're married to someone else? What would you do? In the "7:15 A.M." episode of "Once Upon A Time," this theme is explored in a way that's insightful, character driven and with emotion that dips deeper than your typical TV script. Take for a moment, the fanciful idea that you and another person are meant to be together and, in an alternate fantasy world, you eventually overcome many obstacles to marry and explore your love. Mary and David keep skirting around their emotional pull toward each other, wondering how they can "do the right thing" and not break David's wedding vows. David is married to Kathryn and yet he feels this undeniable tug of emotion for Mary. He is drawn to her, wanting to see her and find more time to be with her, but has chosen to remain faithful to his wife. He wants to live up to his promise to love and cherish Kathryn and yet their life is lacking that quintessential spark of friendship and love that a married couple often has.
Yet, marriage, I would say, is a magic roller coaster ride that is filled with challenges and some of the most heartfelt of experiences. Maintaining a long term marriage that spans decades takes work. Plain and simple. Love and the romantic belief that the emotion will conquer all is sometimes overplayed. Do we not all wish that "Love is patient, love is kind" and the "greatest of these is love" were always true? But what happens when a person falls out of love and is drawn to another. David is experiencing that doubt. He has woken from his comma and is told that he loves Kathryn and is married to her, but he is not feeling that. We, the viewers, know that Snow White and Prince Charming are meant to be together--we want to see them unite because we believe it is right.
But what of Kathryn? She longs to have a child with David. She is married to him and is working hard to make their marriage work, recognizing that all the cylinders aren't firing in their relationship. Thankfully, she is not pregnant, but there's some confusion here: If I understood the storyline correctly, Kathryn takes a pregnancy test, but isn't pregnant. If David doesn't love her, why is he making love to her? When I first saw Kathryn take the pregnancy test in the store, I misunderstood and thought she had cheated on him while he was in a comma and was concerned that she was pregnant by another man, but that's not the case. David is being with her.
If that is true, and David kisses Mary at the end of the episode, then has he not crossed the line and broken not only his vows, but he's trying to have his cake and eat it too (pardon the pun). Is that fair to Mary? I think not. I like David and Mary together. I do. What would I want to have happen? David needs to divorce Kathryn and to move on. Staying with her is not solving any problem, but is only stretching out the issue over time.
Do you love someone else? If you do, then a decision needs to be made: Stick it out and work hard on fixing the problem or leave. Yes, it is that simple (though understanding how you feel might take a good amount of time). David is trying to do both at the same time and, for that, he is no Prince Charming. He is complicating not only his own life, but he is hurting both Kathryn and Mary. There is a lot to learn in this episode and it has a lot of great plot points to debate over some tea and crumpets (or beer and chips if that's more to your liking).
Again "Once Upon A Time" is showing that it has some legs and I believe this is one of the strongest episodes so far this season. I await next week's episode with great anticipation! What do you think?
Ron Vitale is the author of the novel "Cinderella's Secret Diary" and has been a lifelong fan of re-invented fairy tales.
How Writing Changed My Life
Seventeen years ago I had an important decision to make. I didn't know at the time that the decision would change my life forever in such a drastic way that the ripples still could be felt all these years later. But that's how life is. A few days before February 10, 1995 I remember calling my friends up and asking for help, but the declines kept coming in. I called or emailed all my friends asking if they would come support me at a poetry reading at a Borders bookstore near Villanova University. I tried asking people in the graduate program I was attending, close friends and old friends, but everyone had plans that night.
I had come to a fork in the road and needed to make a decision: Would I risk going by myself to read some of my poetry to a good several dozen strangers or would I stay home and play it safe? My initial thought was to seed the audience with a few of my friends so that if people hated my work then at least I'd have some people clapping at the end. Standing up in front of a group of strangers and reading a piece of your writing can be intimidating.
At that time in my life, I was finishing my Masters in English Literature, was working full-time and wanted to be a writer. So the day of the reading came and I remember being at home and, honestly, being a bit frustrated with my friends. How many events had I gone to over the years supporting people or being there for them? More than I could count. Why was no one there for me when I needed help? And then, I heard a tiny voice inside me, and I listened. The path that I wanted to walk on in life would often be challenging and I knew that if I wanted to be a writer that I needed to overcome my fear and couldn't sling blame at my friends. They simply couldn't (or didn't want to) come with me that night. And that was that.
I shook off the negative attitude and drove up to the reading. Yes, I had butterflies in my stomach. Yes, I feared failure. And, yes, I understood that one reading wouldn't change my life forever, but I was wrong about that. It's funny how life can be--if you're open to it. I arrived at the reading and remember a good many people being there. I remember seeing my friend John who worked part-time at Borders. I remember going up to the podium, but I don't recall what I read or the reaction from the audience. I simply remember that it was a positive experience and pretty average in the grand scheme of things.
But I have not forgotten what happened afterward. I went up to my friend John and started talking to him about one of our graduate classes as I helped him fold up the chairs. We were chatting away when I suddenly saw this tall woman with short blonde hair in her early 20s, wearing a long dark green coat come up to John and say hello. He introduced me to her and said, "This is Karen." And that's how I met my wife. God willing, we'll be married for 12 years this summer and now have two wonderful children together--all because I chose to go to a poetry reading on my own.
What I like so much about serendipity is that I fought really hard against going to the poetry reading alone. I wanted one of my female friends to come with me. If one of them had gone, the dynamic would have been different. I wouldn't have been alone and the implication would be that I was dating one of them. I really laugh at this because I remember how frustrated and upset I was that no one would go with me that night. But if they had?
Funny how life is sometimes. Writing changed my life because it's influenced how I make decisions. I try really hard to work against fear (of rejection, failure, abandonment, etc.) and to coin a phrase: Push outside of my comfort zone. If I didn't write and choose to go to the poetry reading that night, I wouldn't have met my wife and have the life I now have. Where would I be? It's not worth the time wondering about because I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.
Joseph Campbell once said, "Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls." And you know what? He was damn right.
Ron Vitale is the author of the novel "Cinderella's Secret Diary" and believes that, if you're open to them, fairy tales do come true.
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